Out of the Ashes

The Third Week in Lent
In the midst of the times of loss and grief in our lives we often find something unexpected. My husband’s family traveled the world as a career Army family. My father-in-law was often given unique gifts. One that was lost in the fire was a real tiger’s skull from a general in Thailand. I didn’t mind loosing that one. But also in the midst of the destruction, some ash covered but still beautiful treasures kept popping up that carried the family story. Lent is like that. In the midst of the darkness we are surprised by a gift of new insights.
I hadn’t realized how close I could feel to victims of loss and suffering until I experienced the ashes.
I hadn’t realized how much I took love and family for granted until I experienced the ashes.
I hadn’t realized how deeply I held onto my false ego until I experienced the ashes.
I hadn’t realized how interconnected we are until I experienced the ashes.
I hadn’t realized how much I needed to depend on others until I experienced the ashes.
Yes, finding gems of challenge and potential healing are gifts we may receive from the ashes. 
Our losses may vary in intensity and content, but the message is the same. There is no hierarchy in grief and loss.The attack on the world trade center came just 20 days after our fire and my father-in-law died two days later. I started to listen to some voices that said, “Well, that must make your loss look very small.”
That comment hurt, and it also made me think I was being selfish to grieve. With help and wise council I learned that no matter the magnitude of one’s grief and loss; loss is real. One gift darkness brings is not to compare who’s loss is greater, but to walk with each other in the midst of all losses. The gift of companionship and care for all is a beautiful treasure that can come from the ashes.


Rev. Jolene Bergstrom Carlson
Executive Director/President 

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